Behind the Mask - Hyunjin x reader

The bar was dimly lit, the lights dancing in front of me as I down yet another shot. 

Ji had texted me, asking if I wanted company, but I had declined. I didn't need an audience for whatever kind of self-destruction this was about to be. 

I just needed to shut my brain off for a few hours. And not think. 

The first drink burned on the way down. So did the second. But by the third, I had stopped thinking about my job. 

And by the fourth, I had almost managed to forget about the existence of Hwang Hyunjin. 

Almost.

I shook my head, my vision blurry. I wasn't really the drinking type. 

I mean sure, I would get wasted every once in a while, whenever Chan and Lix would throw a dinner party. But as contrary to the rest of the boys, I certainly did not go heavy on the liquor. 

Now that Felix had moved in with Chae, though, those evenings happened less often. And I missed it. 

This made my mind drift to the relationship I had grown with the boys over the years. Even though I would see him less often than I used to because of his demanding job and soon to be married situation, Lix was still my brother, and I loved him to death. His upcoming wedding with Chae who had grown to become my number 1 girl made me so happy. 

And proud. Because hey, I kinda was the reason they met, hehe. 

Ji was... well, Ji. The one constant in my life. My anchor. 

The one who always knew what to say, even when I didn't want to hear it. He had been there through it all, through every high and low. 

He was always there for me, and I was always there for him. He was the first I talked to about the Hyunjin situation. Not that Lix wasn't my confident anymore, but since he was kind of going through the same thing with Minho moving abroad, we connected in a way that only us could really get. 

And comforted each other in those times. 

I loved the other boys equally as much. My mind went to Chan, and I let out a dry laugh. The irony of it all. The history we shared, the moment we had once had. 

Brief, impulsive, and fueled by alcohol.

One kiss at a party, years ago. And no, I am not talking about this one truth or dare. That was a different story. 

This one was certainly not a dare. 

One night when we were both tipsy, and clearly not thinking straight. 

We were dancing together, and before I knew it, his lips were on mine, warm and insistent. For a second, it had felt right. 

But then the second passed, and I remember pulling away, both of us staring at each other like we had just crossed a line neither of us should have.

The next morning, we had laughed  it off, decided we were better off as friends.

And that was that. 

I exhaled sharply, shaking my head as if that would clear it.

More drinks. More distractions. That's what I needed right now. 

The bartender raised an eyebrow at me but poured another shot in the empty glass anyways. I downed it in one go, welcoming the burning sensation. 

But as my hand went to grab another one, something wrapped around my wrist, stopping me mid-motion, and I frowned. 

- What the hell-

- That's enough, a voice said firmly, tightening his grip on my wrist, and my heart fell in my chest as the voice sounded way too familiar.