Little Zhang || Exo

-3rd person-

"Chenlu? Are you okay?" Yixing croaked out,  rubbing his eyes sleepily. He was still asleep but thought he'd heard a noise and since chenlu had fallen asleep on the couch, he'd got up to see if she was okay.

But she wasn't there.

He frowned and looked around before walking to the bathroom, kicking the door open slightly to see if chenlu was in there.

She wasn't there either.

He walked into Chanyeols room, to see if she'd hopped in his bed at some point during the night either but the way Chanyeol lay spread out across the bed like a star fish showed there was no chenlu there either.

What the fuck?

Maybe she's just gone for a walk. He thought to himself as he ran a hand through his hair.

At four in the morning?

That had to be the only logical explanation for where she was. There was hardly anyone around at 4am, so it was likely for her to go out then. Besides, she liked feeling of the cold night air in her face.

"I'll just wait for her to come back." He said, as he walked into the kitchen, making some coffee for himself.

That's when he saw it.

A letter in a pastel blue envelope.

Hello. It's me, chenlu.
I wonder who found this letter first. Was it baekhyun? I told you to stop going through my shit! If it is you baek, or any other member, please stop reading here. My brother needs to be the first to read this.
Big brother, I'm sorry.
I did it again.
Looks like history repeated itself.
Typical of me to run away from my problems and to leave without saying goodbye huh?
I haven't changed much from six years ago I guess.
Please forgive me. I didn't want there to be tears. I didn't want to leave, not like this, not at all.
But isn't it time that I finally took some control? Isn't it time that I finally did something that mum and dad can be proud of? In all honesty, I don't care about them being proud of me. I want you proud of me. 'That's my baby sister. I raised her. I looked after her' I owe you that. You deserve that.
It's time all off you learnt the truth: please don't be mad. Please don't hate me.

I'm not going back to China. I lied.

Chanyeol was right, I have nothing there. There's nothing for me there. I wanted to start fresh, I wanted a clean slate. I wanted to go somewhere I could be me and only me. Not 'The Little Zhang.' Just me. Zhang chenlu. And if it doesn't work out for me, fine. I'll move onto the next place. I just don't want to be afraid anymore. I don't want my past to haunt me anymore, I'm tired of it.
I need to do something right.
For you guys, all of you.
As you read this, I'll be on my way to Spain. I'll be staying there for a while before going to Italy and probably the most of Europe. Maybe there I can find myself.
It's the best thing for me I promise.
Don't be sad Kyungsoo, don't feel lonely baekhyun, please don't cry Chanyeol. You all have a eachother, you're a family and now, you've become my family. Please take care of my brother and eachother.
The question you're probably wondering is: will we ever see you again? And my answer is: of course! You guys can't get rid of me that easily.
But not for a long time. So do your best until then okay? Work your hardest!
I promise we can still talk all the time, I'll FaceTime you all, just like I promised. I'll never fully leave you all behind.
Chanyeol, I'm sorry. You must be so mad at me right now but I hope you later come to understand why I did what I did. I know it's a lot to ask and you don't have to but wait for me, okay? I can't say that I love you just yet, that would be unfair but I promise when I come back, I'll be here to stay and I'll be so much better than before. I know you like me the way I am but I don't want to have to rely on you fully all the time. So please understand. I'm sorry.
Please don't be sad, this isn't goodbye just a simple 'see you later'
In the past few months we've all had such a good time and I don't remember the last time I smiled so much, even when I felt so low, all 9 of you were always there to make me feel better. I'm truly grateful to have you, please look after my brother whilst I'm away.
I promise it won't be 6 years until I see you again.
And if you ever feel lonely, just remember that no matter where I am, day or night, we're closer than you think, for we are all under the same sky, same sun and Sam stars.
I love you all, thank you for everything and goodbye.
-the awkward loner Zhang Chenlu .

Yixing dropped the letter and stood up, not really knowing what to do or how to feel. He so badly wanted It all to be a joke, for chenlu to come out from somewhere and hug him.

But he knew his sister.

He looked around. Every piece of her was gone, even the purple elephant blanket she used to sleep on the couch with and the books that were usually scattered everywhere that drove minseok up the wall. Everything was gonna apart from this letter.

This stupid fucking letter.

He just wanted to hug her one last time.

But he wasn't angry at her. Yes, he was hurt that she didn't have it in her to say goodbye. But he would be waiting, Chanyeol would be waiting, everyone would be waiting until she came next.

To see the chenlu that she wanted to be.

The chenlu that Yixing would shove off to everyone.

Because she was his baby sister.

He remembered when he held her for the dirts time, her first steps, her first words everything.

She'd be back.

He knew she would.

"Yixing, what are you doing?" Chanyeol asked as he leaned against the doorframe. He raised his eyebrows and looked around. "Where's chenlu?"

"I'm sorry Chanyeol. She's gone."

Chanyeol sighed as he took the letter out of the elders hand, reading through it. "She's gone." He said, patting Yixings back, tears brimming in his eyes. "But she'll be back. And I'll wait for her till then."

"What's going on?" Baekhyun said "it's too early to be awake?"

"Chenlu's gone."

Just like that, the little Zhang was gone.