Winston and I finished up our conversation quickly after that.
I walked out of the barn, and I sat down against a tree for while.
I closed my eye's, as I thought about all the interactions Newt and I had in the last three years.
Was there any signs of this that I missed?
Or any signs that I just disregarded because Newt and I fought for so long?
Maybe I was the one that pushed him away?
No, he pushed me away just as much as I did to him.
"You and Winston have a good chat?" Newt spoke suddenly, pulling me away from the thoughts that bounced around in my head.
My eyes jolted open.
"You scared me." I told him, as he sat down next to me.
"It's lunch." Newt smiled, as he handed me one of the two plates in his hands.
"Thanks." I said, trying my best not to sound awkward.
Well, it was awkward.
Having just found out about everything Newt has felt in the last three years, now sitting next to him...
"Well, you haven't slapped me in the face so... I guess you took it well." Newt joked.
I rolled my eyes, then I smiled.
"Three years you held that in? And you couldn't have just told me from the beginning?" I chuckled back, trying to ease the tension in my questions.
"I didn't know how to say it. I mean, we didn't see eye to eye for a while. Now, I know it's my fault for the way I acted all that time, but it's not that simple. Just because we didn't see eye to eye, didn't mean I ever stopped caring about you." Newt said, as he dug into his lunch.
"Oh, yeah?" I asked, as I dug into mine.
"Yes, do you remember that time you were really sick? When you were laid up in the med-jacks for almost a week?" Newt suddenly asked.
"Barely." I spoke quietly.
The one and only time I was really sick here, was about a year and a half ago.
Man, I was really sick.
I had a fever of over 103 and I was seeing double.
I could barley move, my whole body was swollen and covered in sweat.
I shook my head no, "I can barely remember anything from that week. I only remember bits and pieces. Like once in a while when I opened my eyes, one person sitting there holding a cold cloth over my head. It was always the same person and they always told me-"
I stopped myself.
As the very few memories that I had from that time flooded back, I realized.... that person was Newt.
"Close your eyes, you need to rest." He said finishing my sentence, confirming my thoughts.
I sat there silently, completely speechless.
Though at that time when I was so sick and it seemed like Newt hated my guts, he took care of me the whole time.
Just like I did when he broke his ankle.
"Thank you for taking care of me." I managed to say.
Newt gave me a little nod, as he smiled.
"You're welcome," He said back, "Thank you for taking care of me."
"You're welcome." I told him.
And in that moment, as we both look at each other as if we're were the only two people that, we both now completely understand that fact that over the last three years we did care about each other.
And despite everything that has happened, maybe we did actually love each other.
Not knowing what love really was or even remembering what love was.
We both felt it.
We both knew the warmth it gave in one another's presence.
We knew love from each other.
We knew what love was, because we were both full of it.
"You know, even when I had to carry you back to your room when you were black out from Gally's drinks, I still thought you were the prettiest thing I had ever seen." Newt chuckled, breaking the silence.
"Oh nooooo, that was so embarrassing." I covered my face with both of my hands.
Last year at one of the fires, I really over did it was Gally's drinks.
"All I remember was running around, then falling, then waking up in my room with the worst headache of my life." I groaned.
"Well, let me tell you what really happened.." Newt smiled, as he told the story.
"And, you've had enough." Frypan laughed, as he took the remainder of my jar away from me.
He wasn't lying of course.
I could barley see straight.
My whole body felt light and fuzzy.
"Oh, come onnnnnn." My words slurred together in my drunken state.
"No more for tonight." He chuckled, as I stumbled back.
Now, I didn't like that idea... so I took off running.
I was stumbling around, sloppily running in zigzag patterns, giggling.
"Stop! You're gonna fall!" Frypan yelled, as he chased after me.
And.. what do you know... I fell right to the ground.
"You're gonna feel that one in the morning." Frypan said as he stood at my feet, trying at catch his breath.
I couldn't stop laughing.
Everything is so much funnier when you're drunk.
"She's bloody plastered." Newt huffed, as he seemed to appear next to Frypan.
"Yeah, I told her she needed she was cut off... and she started running." Frypan told him.
"Alright, you're going to bed to sleep this off." Newt said, as the two of them lifted me to my feet.
As the two of them let go of me, I started to stumble back again.
They both grabbed onto my arms to steady me, to keep me from falling.
"Man, she can't even stand up without almost toppling over." Frypan said.
"Help me." I chuckled.
Frypan and Newt both looked at each other, then back at me, then back at each other.
"I'm out, man. This is all you." Frypan threw his hands up in the air.
Newt let out a sigh, before he picked me up.
My legs draped over one of his arms, while the other held me behind my back, just under my arms.
I laid my head against his chest, as he carried me off and into the homestead.
He carried me up into my room, shutting the door behind us, as he laid me onto my bed.
Newt changed my clothes, tucked me into bed, before leaving for the night.
"I was wondering where that gray shirt came from." I said, as Newt finished the story.
"Yeah, well... I didn't know where your clothes were, so I just grabbed one of mine."
"That also explains why I didn't have any pants on." I chuckled, as I finished my meal, "you know... I still have that shirt. I still wear it sometimes. Why didn't you say anything sooner? I would have given it back."
"That's alright. Besides, I like seeing you wear that shirt." Newt shrugged.
That's when Chuck ran up to us.
"They're back from the maze.... Thomas and Minho..." Chuck said, as he fought to catch his breath.
Newt and I quickly got up and made our way over to the two of them.
As we got closer, we could see that Gally had already made his way over to them.
Gally and Thomas were already arguing by the looks of it.
Their faces were red and their hands waved in the air, as they yelled back and forth.
Oh, this wasn't going to end well.