Choose or Not Choose (Dazai x Reader)

Me and Dazai?

The question would be the same thing to be asked between me and him. Most people would have envy on us, jealous, mistrust, also assumptions. Just because we were close, didn't mean we had something going on....

Or so I thought...?

The tension in the hallway hung thick between Y/N and Dazai, the air charged with unspoken words and the weight of betrayal. Y/N's frustration boiled beneath the surface, manifesting in the tight grip on her clenched fists. The echoes of the lady's nagging about proper posture still lingered, but the real storm was brewing between the two.

"Don't you have something better to do?" Y/N's voice cut through the silence as she forcefully opened one door, leading to another hallway. Dazai, unfazed, hurriedly slipped through the narrow opening, closing the door behind him with a slight puff.

"Don't be like that, please..." Dazai implored, his words trailing behind Y/N as she took purposeful strides. Finally, she stopped abruptly, and a heavy sigh escaped her. The weight of the confrontation loomed in the air as she turned to face him.

"Does this make you feel better? To know you betrayed my fucking trust?" Y/N's voice was sharp, her eyes glaring into his brown orbs. Dazai met her gaze, his expression giving away nothing.

In the quiet hallway, it was just the two of them, surrounded by the echoes of unspoken feelings and shattered trust. The world outside seemed to fade away as they stood there, a tempest of emotions swirling between them. Dazai, usually adept at defusing situations with humor, found himself unable to conjure any words.

Y/N's emotions were raw, laid bare in the intensity of her gaze. The unspoken question lingered in the air, and for a moment, the world stood still. It was a pivotal point, a moment where their relationship teetered on the edge of change.

Dazai, still looking into Y/N's eyes, finally broke the silence. "Y/N, I never meant to hurt you," he began, his voice sincere. "But there are things you don't know, things I couldn't tell you."

Y/N's glare softened, confusion mixing with the anger in her eyes. The hallway became a silent arena for a battle of emotions, a confrontation that would define the path ahead for Y/N and Dazai. The weight of their shared history and the potential for a different future hung in the balance, awaiting resolution in the hushed, tension-filled space between them.

"you-" Her breath stammered for a bit. Her eyes were swelling up from the hurt he caused her to be away from Oda and the children, Her family. With the bit of courage and strength it took her, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Facing the boy whom she was beginning to love and get attach too.

"I will never forgive you."

But you did, didn't you?

I looked up to Aktugawa and nodded. This boy, I feel bad. He probably was treated badly from Dazai from what I heard. This is probably the longest conversation I've had with him to be honest. Progress is something.

"I did. Find me stupid or something, but I can't keep holding a grudge to someone. Do you know why?"

Aktugawa

"Why?" I asked her. Y/N was sure a bit emotional when telling me the full story between her and Dazai.......

"Because you can't forgive someone if you have a grudge or hate against them. It's like, not able to forgive yourself......." She explained and looked at her palms......for some reason, I felt her words. I felt moved just by a simple sentence. Or so more like, it made a bit sense....it was weird and odd. 

"You have to forgive someone with a healed heart..." She explained once more and looked up to me. For some reason, Y/N was odd. She looked at me with a small smile......

I am no expert of love or some stuff about it, but for someone as Y/N, tied in the Port Mafia, she looked more happier after what happen. No one really knows where she was throughout the disaster, but it was to be told that she was trapped in a different dimension with Dazai....she looked as if she is happy after being stuck with him......

"Aktugawa, you're doing more than enough. Don't hold on to what Dazai did or said to you...."

You're doing great....

"Chuuya, you really didn't have to come with me you know?" Her eye's scanned around the isle of flowerpots, running her slender fingers through the packets. Chuuya stood behind her but faced the opposite way to make sure she was safe. Y/N was finally able to go out the Port Mafia's headquarters and have a day out to go wherever she wanted to go.

"You really think this easy for me after everything? i can't let the same thing happening again, it's better when I am with you." Y/N heard him say before picking out a packet of "Forget me not" flowers. She sighed before turning to him, his backing facing her as he watched the crowds of people passing by them. She softly placed her right hand on his shoulders, being careful to not startled him.

Chuuya just stood quiet and watched the reflection of Y/N through the stores glass window. Her eyes never failed to lose his memorization for them. It was beautiful.

"Trust me, Chuuya. I will be fine. Mori won't use me as a bargaining chip anymore" She softly said to him. Chuuya couldn't express how glad he was to know that Y/N will no longer be some type of trading affair for the Port Mafia to be greater.

"But how can I trust that Dazai—" He was interrupted as Y/N, turning to face him with determination in her eyes, declared, "I have no intentions of seeing him anymore." The surprise flickered in Chuuya's eyes, and as he softened, placing his hands on hers, he turned fully towards her, his gloved hands enveloping her warmth. Apart from how much Dazai made them both go through.... This was probably his chance to at least.... have her to himself?......

"Are you sure?" he asked, seeking reassurance. With a gentle squeeze of their entwined hands, Y/N, carrying the weight of her decision, met his gaze.

"More than anything..." She squeezed his hands softly, with a heavy heart aching inside of her. With a small regret, she looks at him softly.

"We'll be fine."

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