Here's To Everything that You've Gone Through ? Jensoo

Quite opposite really, Jennie grew up with a family that was much more in an upper middle class. Jennie had always lived her life without a single worry about money.

Throughout her life, she had travelled to so many places, be it the exotic Tuvalu or the snowy cold Greenland. In South Korea, she had her family house in Seoul, a holiday villa in Jeju, and even her own penthouse that was given to her when she turned sixteen. Her family had their own group of maids and a private chef. Truly, financial struggles had never been a problem, despite global economic crashes and whatnot.

However, her parents always taught her to respect everyone despite the differences between classes, so she grew up always respectful and full of kindness.

Her family was pretty small, considering she was the only child her parents had. Her mother was a diplomatic representative of South Korea, so in her early childhood, she lived in Auckland, New Zealand, for some while before moving back to Seoul when her mom retired. Her father was a chain fast food restaurant owner that had spread all across South Korea, and even some other East Asian countries. Their family started as a small happy one, but as they grew, their directions grew apart.

Jennie had always been an artistic girl. While she was really smart academically, and even thrived, she never really had much interest in science. However, her father sort of insisted-like every other Asian parent-she got into medical school. Meanwhile, her mother wanted Jennie to follow her steps and fill in her shoes to become a diplomat.

There were so many expectations to reach, though frankly she couldn't care less.

If there was a problem Jennie faced since she was young, it was not a huge one. Even when Jennie felt that it was in fact a big problem. But she tried to think about it as little as possible, even though it constantly bothered her.

Jennie felt a little... empty. As if she was a meaningless plastic bottle drifting all alone off the shore. As if she was a hollow shell in the midst of the sand on the beach. As if she was a small fish running around the undecorated fishbowl.

She was happy, sure. Jennie had everything she could ever have and she was very grateful for it, especially when not every kid was as lucky as she was. Financially, she was stable. Her family, though sometimes distant and cold, had almost no problems. She was smart, pretty, kind, and well loved by society. She received care and attention and nothing less nor more. She had friends who adored her and lived a very normal life. But, she struggled to find meaning in what she was doing.

So, she sheltered herself by looking tough, confident, fashionable, and cool.

Jennie did art. She expressed herself through paintings and drawings. She did pottery. She wrote and composed songs. She danced. She wrote poems and stories. But it didn't feel enough while at the same time feeling too much.

So, she often wondered if that was what being alive meant - to feel too much and nothing all at once. And it hurt. It was exhausting.

But the people around her could not understand her. "What are you tired for? You're not even doing anything," said her mom. "You're always entitled to rest, when you did barely any work," said her dad. "You're privileged. I don't think you truly need that much rest," said her friends.

So, she filled her schedule with volunteering gigs, weekend art markets, mentoring underprivileged youth, and learning French just because she thought maybe being bilingual in a romantic language would make her life feel... less dull. She tried to make herself useful, or at least deserving for a rest from life. But all of it felt like coloring the edges of a picture she couldn't bring herself to finish.

She didn't know when it had started - that emptiness curling beneath her ribs like a slow frost. But she knew exactly when she'd started to feel warm again.