Toss a Coin ? THE WITCHER ONESHOTS

Requested by: @Zoie-Marie &

Both requested for Geralt x Jaskier and this is the first I've worked on so far.. Thanks for requesting! 💕

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"Geralt!" Jaskier yelled from the tent that he shared with his lover. He had just woke up and found the tent empty, save himself. Jaskier quickly pulled on his shirt and trousers, tripping over his boots as he peeked out of the tent.

Geralt was not far from the tent, meditating under the morning sun.

"There you are!" Jaskier chirped, stalking up the hill to place a kiss on Geralt's cheek. "Happy birthday! I have quite a special day planned for you, first we'll go for a lovely walk, or we can ride Roach. You may choose, but after that, I learned a delicious soup to make for lunch. Then-"

Jaskier was cut off by grunt from Geralt, one that any other person would take as a sign to stop speaking. Jaskier, however, knew it was disdain for the birthday plans. He gasped dramatically, stepping in front of Geralt and casting his shadow across the witcher's face.

"Geralt! It's your birthday! Your day of birth! One of the most spectacular days in your life, second only to the day you met me! Well, perhaps third.. To the day we started dating.. Regardless, very high on the list of very important days!" Jaskier chimed, grabbing Geralt's arm and pulling him to his feet. Geralt moved begrudgingly, but still stood up. "Now, we are going to go through my 'sweet shnookim's birthday balooza' activities and you are going to enjoy it!"

Geralt sighed as Jaskier pulled him down the hill. "Fine. What's first?"

***

Jaskier screamed for Geralt's help while the witcher chuckled from the river bank. The bard's plans started off smooth, yet slowly escalated towards disaster as the day passed.

The pair started the morning with a lovely walk near a flower field, which also happened to be a deserted battlefield full of ghouls. Geralt handled the necrophages with ease while Jaskier cheered him on from the road. Next, they returned to their camp for the soup Jaskier had learned, though it missed a few key ingredients because, well... They rotted. Nonetheless, he made it work. After that, Jaskier took Geralt to the nearby river for a fun game he used to play as a child. The idea was to get in a barrel and see how far down the river you could make it before toppling over.

That's when Geralt dared Jaskier to try and ride in the barrel head first, which left only his ass and feet sticking out. Jaskier, unable to deny any challenge, agreed. Of course, he assumed Geralt simply wanted a good view of his ass, but Geralt had another plan.

Which led to Jaskier screaming and Geralt chuckling, because Jaskier had managed to get his barrel pinned on a rock out in the center of the river and couldn't do anything about it.

"Geralt! Please! There's a snake!!! A SNAKE!!!" Jaskier yelled, frantically trying to get away from the reptile.

"I'm sure it's harmless." Geralt called out. "Probably just a water snake."

Jaskier continued to scream, and Geralt finally decided he pranked his lover enough. Wading out through the water, he climbed onto the rock and firmly gripped Jaskier's thighs.

Jaskier finally stopped screaming, instead he purred, "Oh, Geralt. Do go on!"

Geralt shook his head, lifting Jaskier and kicking the barrel away. He helped the bard regain his footing, then firmly gripped his shoulders.

"Jask. I appreciate all the effort for my birthday, but it's seriously not a big deal." Geralt firmly stated. "I don't want to do these stupid activities anymore."