How To Survive In A Dump: The Diary of Mr. Thaddeus

I have found upon my awake a letter that is a considerable ask of I. One that I do not wish to indulge in. However, it comes with a request that with it I shall be able to have my own buggy formed to the way that I desire. A most joyous occasion. One that I am truly acquainted with. Within these writings it was asked again I might add that I give one silver piece per month to the servants of this household and half a brick of gold per year. I shall not do such a thing as it is not in my best interest to part with gold like I have done the one time. I am sure reader you remember this servants most wicked deed. To think he has not brought back what was not for him at all.

However, there was some sort of stipulation where if I still choose to pass on silver brick once a month, I could still create my own buggy but without the use of the magical trees. It would be my pleasure to use any other material as long as I was able to receive the very gift that I truly deserve of myself. I shall take it on my trip to the wall in the morning and be found of my riches great. Is not this something you would expect for one with such handsomeness. It shall be done, and my name will be a covering upon its golden and ruby seats with silver wheels that glisten in sun and moon. My own light will shine within this beautiful piece as I go by to the applause and dismay of onlookers both rich and poor. And I will neither look upon such scum or acknowledge their presence as they remain in their rightful place. Beneath the very wheels of my beautiful chariot. If any shall even think twice to touch such an attractive contraption with the exception of those who work to bring me from place to place, they shall experience a wrath so great that even the dead will have compassion upon their souls.

I shall not forgive such wickedness of those who bear the resemblance of the vilest of creatures to touch even the skirt of my most stunning contraption. Would it not be gorgeous to see this young master sitting on his traveling throne like a god amongst men. With clothes of fine linen, blue and purple stuff and gold from foot to cheek. To be praised for my greatness would be wonderful and true as it should be to your knowledge dear reader that deserving of such praise is I. I shall color such a contraption with the colors of royalty and have the greatest of steeds to pull it through streets with servants in tow. Every so often they shall wipe the residue off of this beautiful piece so as not ruin it and keep it perfectly clean as I go. If not, they shall each be cast over and beyond the wall and hope that they, in some way may survive such torment that I would desire for no man but them.

I shall dream of a dream of kings