Fearless

Imperials are heavily guarding the palace gates. Everyone is excited for the wedding, except the bride herself, except me.

The servants are the busiest. The wedding is about to start and I am trapped in this life, I am gonna be bound to the same man who has ordered Kai to hunt me.

I am bound to this fate with no way out, no one can defy the king. They are just like me who are left with not a single choice.

Me and Kitt will be sharing the same bed. The same bed that will haunt me forever. The only bed I want to go back to is the bed of red, sweet poppies.

I'm gonna walk down the aisle, conceding to my fate of being bound to this man for eternity. The choice is not held by me, Kitt is the one deciding who I will be for the rest of my life.

Nothing hurts more than this pain I am feeling, the pain of thinking how Kai will feel, the pain of knowing I can never be free again. I wanna go back to Dor where me and Kai are both powerless.

I stand next to Kai, this wedding is no casual. It's extravagant, packed with things that only existed in my imaginary. It is all true yet the success of getting out of poverty is drowning me with a sense of responsibility and power.

I have been zoning out, now the sight in front of me is just Kitt, smirking with the same smugness he showed when I said yes.

Kitt has said his vows, I said mine. Now, "you may kiss the bride." I don't want to, but I have to. It is not wanted, but it's a must.

My lips touched Kitt's, he tastes sweet, which Kai is anything but, yet I crave the taste of his lips, the lips that have tasted me, the eyes that have seen me.

Tears pooled in my eyes, but I forced them back. I don't want to cry on my wedding day. I don't want to cry.

                              ~~~

I put my clothes back on, it has been a day since my wedding. I now lay in bed next to Kitt, not my choice but I am bound to it. This guy has seen every part of me, but he can't touch what Kai has engraved into his very being. My soul.

Kitt is covered by a blanket, the only thing visible is his head. I don't wish to see more.

"Morning, Beautiful." Kitt's deep, sleepy voice echoed across the room, eyeing me standing while putting my shirt on.

I feel uncomfortable but there is no more of me he didn't see. I wish I can go back, I wish I said no. Death is better than knowing another man has touched me. Way more intimately that Kai has done.

"Morning. . ." I looked down to my toes, slipping back in bed with him. I don't want to imagine what happens if I don't.

Kitt chuckled lowly, "you can go downstairs if you're hungry." He said.

I nodded and stood up, scurrying down the long staircase. I sat onto a chair, fresh food is handed to me, but the taste is dull, just like how my life is now.

Kai is sitting opposite of me. His inky black waves are the same as I last saw them, messy and beautiful, but something has changed. Perhaps it's his eyes, they are more droopy and his jaw isn't tense.

He looks exhausted, pool of dark circles are under his eyes. I don't think he has slept, and it is all because of me. He isn't even glancing at me. . .

Kitt arrived, now I am back to being my title. The queen of Ilya. Kitt sits beside me, his arm around my waist while Kai is silently eating. I am just pushing food on my plate. I don't want to do anything else.

I love Kai, I love Kitt. I'm a desperate fucking girl, but I will choose Kai over the King any day.