UNREQUITED LOVE-THE UNSTRECHED STRINGS OF TWO HEARTS ??

I woke up to the sunlight falling on my face. I felt myself hugging someone and when I opened my eyes I was met with a view which at once was my whole life. I saw Sidharth already looking at me with those emotions in his eyes that I actually wanted to be true but they aren't.
I suddenly realised our position and felt too awkward.
Sana: Umm....I'm sorry.
Sid: Kis liye?
Sana: For sleeping like this.
Sid: Yesterday when you slept while sitting did you said me anything nhi na phir mujhe sorry kyun bol rahi hai sweetheart.
Sana: IDK Sidharth this is not right, me being this close to you although unknowingly is not right.
With this I got up and went to freshen up unable to meet his eyes which were hurt when I said that.
I always carried an extra pair of clothing with me all thanks to the emergency I once, actually we faced years back. I came out and saw Sidharth no where. I was relaxed as I didn't have to face him again but in my heart there is a fear that what if he has gone to smoke again.

Mind: So how does it matter?
Heart: It matters
Mind: Why?
Heart: because I care, I can't let him destroy his life for whatever reason it may be.
Mind: even if that means to destroy your own life.
Heart: Yes if that ensures that he would be alright.
Mind: Stop before it's too late, it's his life Shehnaaz and you don't even know the reason for his behaviour.
Heart: No I won't let him enter my life again but I will make sure that he control his habits that only hurts him.

Shutting down the conversation between my heart and my mind I went to the living room thinking

"It hurts Sidharth it actually hurts to show that I hate you, it hurts when I see that helplessness in your eyes, it hurts even when I talk to you arrogantly because even though whatever you have done to me, to us the fact still remains the same I can't hate you Sidharth.... I just can't......
My heart says to let loose and be the same once again...
My mind on the contrary warns me again."

I saw him setting the table with two plates of Poha and two cups of coffee. He was so engrossed in this that he didn't noticed me coming there.
Sana: Sidharth...
Sid: baby come have breakfast.
I didn't intended to have it but the way he was asking made me have it.
Sana: tumne banaya?
Sid(sarcastically): Koi aur dikh raha hai yahan?
Sana: Koi javab seedhe tarah se de nhi sakte na tum.
Sid (extra sweetly): Obviously maine banaya baby acha nhi laga.
Sana: Acha nhi Sidharth it's awesome.

I said genuinely being impressed with the taste of the Poha.

Sana: Vaise why did you made two coffee's?
Sid: Yeh kaisa sawaal hua Shehnaaz?
Sana: I mean I told you yesterday only that I don't drink coffee anymore then..
Sid: Dekho kal tumne hi bola na khaane par koi nakhre nahi and vaise bhi I was craving to have coffee with you as it has been a very long time. And don't worry achi lagegi tumhe as it's just the way you liked before.

He said it without even realising what he actually said. I didn't even intended to ask why did he said that because that would cause the situation being more awkward. I had the coffee he made and as said it was having the exact taste i loved years back.
I don't know if you know the actual reason for me not drinking coffee Sidharth but as long as you don't force me to tell you something that once related us I would be grateful.

Sidharth (in mind): I know Sana that the reason for you not having coffee is not what you told infact it's me.

Sana: Nhi na Sidharth I don't wanna have coffee outside.
Sid: Par kyun sweetheart, see I booked your favourite cafe too chal na.
Sana: Bola na nhi Jaana coffee peene yaar kyun force kar raha hai.
Sid: Acha chal tere favourite nhi toh mere favourite main chale... Wanna go to Starbucks?
Sana: No.
Sid: But mera bahot man kar raha hai bahar jaane ka.
Sana: Haan toh chalte hai bahar and you could have coffee alone but I don't wanna have it.
Sid: Arey par..
Sana: Nhi na bebu jahan bolega vahan chalungi bas coffee nhi peeni bahar.
Sid(irritated voice): Yaar I'm really craving for coffee aajtak toh kabhi mana nhi kiya tha infact u were the first one to go outside to have coffee toh ab kya hua?
Sana(without realising): Haan toh baba tab I didn't had the coffee you made for me. Ab meri kya galti hai that you have spoiled my taste for any other coffee than yours.
Sid(smirking): Oh toh yeh reason tha madam seedhe seedhe bol dete itne nakhre karne ki zaroorat nhi thi.
Sana(putting hands around his neck): Seedhe Seedhe bol deti toh aap irritate kaise hote...
Sid: Acha ji.
Sana: Haanji.