I Don't Like This World, I Only Like You (我不喜歡這世界，我只喜歡你) by Qiao Yi (喬一)

When we were little, Guanchao always bullied me. He wouldn't let me play with him and stole my snacks. I was a lot chubbier than him, so I had the upper hand in physical fights. When he couldn't win by grabbing, he'd resort to acting. Before I could even raise a fist, if he saw Mom coming, he'd instantly fall to the ground, curl up, and start wailing in agony—a flawless performance.

So I got a beating from Mom.

Of course, I had clever moments too. Once Mom was teaching us to write. I couldn't remember how to write my own name but managed to learn his. I wrote "Guanchao's Tomb" on a popsicle stick and stuck it proudly into a flowerpot.

And got beaten again.

There are many types of sibling relationships—some are affectionate, some like best friends, some can't stand each other. Guanchao and I are the type that fought since birth.

His sharp tongue is an inborn talent. Even in the womb, he must've been roasting people. I was a real chubby kid, and in winter, Mom bundled us up. No matter how many layers he wore, he never looked fat, but I would puff up like a ball.

He'd look at me in concern and say, "What are you going to do when you get married? Other brides look like princesses in wedding gowns—you'll look like a steamed bun."

I had frequent nightmares where Tuxedo Mask married me. During the vows in church, the priest said, "You may now kiss the bride." Tuxedo Mask lifted my veil... and found a pork-and-cabbage bun underneath.

Later, I inexplicably slimmed down and stayed that way. A few days ago, I weighed myself, felt smug, and sent him a photo: "Look! Under 90 pounds~"

He replied: "If you weigh under 100, you're either flat-chested or short. You got both~"