Party 'til you pass out / When the party's over

2.6

'A lot has changed, yeah. Eh, I got divorced a few years ago and it really fucked me up, hence the emotional rollercoaster on Amo.' She chuckled a bit.

'A rollercoaster it sure is. The album is very different from what you guys have put out earlier. How do you think the public will receive this?'

'I hope good. Yeah, it's a different sound and maybe not for everybody, but in my opinion, as a band, you can't keep making the same music over and over again. Growth only shows when being able and daring to experiment with things, and we certainly did with this album.'

'But there's an undertone of bittersweet love throughout the album,' Penny stated, drinking some from her glass. I huffed a bit, and let my hand play with a coaster for a moment.

'Certainly,' I then said. 'I've always been open about my emotions in my lyrics, that isn't any different on Amo.'

'Why is the album called Amo, Spanish or either Portuguese for love, when it's mostly about your heartbreak?' Fuck, she really knew her questions. I sighed and played with the coaster again, shrugging.

'My marriage was the best time of my life. And I think the love I felt back then deserves the honor to be expressed in my music too, even though it ended up in a severe heartbreak.'

*

Alison

It had been a real joy to be on the road with Of Mice And Men in the past weeks, even though Austin had stepped out of the band due to health issues three years ago. I hadn't seen him for a long while, and I felt bad for thinking that it wasn't the same without him. But I had really enjoyed being around Aaron, Phil, Tino and especially Alan. They were funny, kind, crazy and grown up at the same time - well, except for Alan maybe.

I had been travelling for work for a few years now. My photography had taken me places I used to only dream of before. My name was well known in the music industry, and even after divorcing Oliver, I had gotten a lot of emails inquiring collaborations with bands, brands, celebrities - it was insane. I only had to pick out the ones that I liked most, and I could spend weeks or months abroad if I wanted. And it was exactly what I needed, because I just really needed to leave my life in the UK behind for a while - not knowing 'that while' would turn into a few years. After the divorce came through, I made the mistake to start spending more time with Brian again. Though I never intended to get back with him, my grief had led me into his arms and we had slept together once. I had regretted it immediately, since I never meant anything with it, but Brian thought the opposite. And once again, I had to be that bitch to break his heart. And it was really ugly again.

After that, I just felt the need to run away, to leave everything behind and burn all my ships. My parents didn't understand, but I had never told them why I left the country so suddenly. They thought it was because of Oliver, which was no lie, and they still supported me wherever I ended up. They even came over to see me when I spent a few months in New York last year.

Needless to say, my job was taking me places and gave me a lot of experiences, good and bad. And even though it sometimes felt like I had run away from my emotions instead of facing them, I was doing okay most of the time now.

Since that failed fling with Brian, I had never spent another minute with a guy in a romantic way. I just didn't want to, afraid to make another mistake, to get my heart broken again or break someone's heart myself. I didn't dare to come close, but I hated being alone too. So being around people all the time worked for me, even though it was pure platonically. The times I had been home in between commissions and travels made me homesick to other places and people, so I never stayed home for long. But whenever I was, I still hung out with Tom, and sometimes Lizzy. He was the only person from my past with Oliver who had stayed in my life, and he was still my best friend - despite being his brother. But Oliver was hardly ever a topic of conversation between us, only when I asked about him. Because despite hating his guts, I sometimes wondered how he was doing - just like right now.