Lost Loving Souls (Connor x Reader)

*Meanwhile*

You sat with your sister, explaining everything that had happened. She took in the information with a straight face, thinking about each word you said. After you were done explaining your mistake, you sat there, crying. 

"I did the exact same thing Shane did. I'm such an idiot." You whimpered.

"No, this wasn't your fault." You looked at her as she finally spoke. "(Y/n), you weren't conscious of what you were doing and neither was Gavin. Neither of you is at fault. If you hadn't been in those states, you would've never done it. Shane did it with a clear head. You aren't like him. You regret it and he didn't. So don't you dare compare yourself to him. You two are nothing alike. He was a monster and you're not even close to that." She told you. You frowned.

"But...what am I going to do? How can I live with this if every time I see either of them I just feel so much guilt." She thought about it and sighed.

"(Y/n), we all make mistakes in life. Sometimes, you have to choose whether to run from it or learn from it. Don't run from it like I did. Learn from it. I'm sure you and Connor will be fine. Besides, it's not like you love Gavin and it's not like he loves you. Well, at least not in the same way. You get my point. Anyway, Gavin cares for Collin and you care for Connor. It's alright to feel bad about it, but don't beat yourself up over it. You've learned and it's not going to happen again. That's all there is to it." You began to calm down and you nodded.

"Alright. Y-you're right." You admitted. She smiled softly at you.

"Now, get some sleep. You've had a long night." She told you. You nodded. She helped you to bed and tucked you in. You were exhausted after all of the emotions and crying, so you were grateful that she didn't mind helping you out. After you were laying down and your head had hit the pillow, you blacked out almost instantly.

Cass' POV

I watched as she fell asleep almost right away. I sighed and walked out of the room. I needed to think. I headed out and went downstairs into the main area of the building. As I was walking, I heard a voice. 

"What are you doing up so late?" I turned. 

"Oh, hey, North. Well...hey, I could ask you the same, you know." I replied with a light chuckle. She smiled a little. "Well, if you want to find out, care to join me for a walk and talk?" I asked. She nodded after a moment.

"Sure." We headed out of New Jericho, choosing a random direction and sticking to it. "So? What's bothering you?" I sighed.

"Well, my sister just told me about something that happened and...I wasn't prepared for it. I acted like I knew what to do, but...so much is happening with my family lately. It's strange. It's like all of the drama is happening to us all at once. I mean, what is this? A novel? Are we trying to keep her biography interesting?" I said, joking slightly but still getting my point across. North chuckled slightly with a nod.

"I know how you feel." I raised an eyebrow at her.

"You do?" I asked.

"Well, I'm not a cyborg, but I am dating the leader of all androids. I was with him when he first came to Jericho. I was there for all of it. I know you all were around too, but...you weren't involved in all of that stuff like I was. It did just seem..."

"Overwhelming." We said together. We smiled at each other in amusement and kept walking.

"I guess I wasn't thinking of that," I admitted. 

"Well, I don't know if I'm the right person to come to about this kind of advice, but you've made it this far. At least that's something." She told me.

"Yeah, I guess it is. I'm sure it'll be fine. I mean, it's nothing truly life-changing that happened, but it would have an effect if it were to get out." I explained.

"What exactly did happen." I sighed.

"It's not my place to tell people, but basically...she just made a mistake and it's bigger than most people would like," I explained. North nodded.

"I'm sure if anybody can work through it, it's you, your sister, and Connor too. None of you guys go down easy. You've all proven that time and again." I laughed a bit at that part.

"No kidding!" I agreed. I sighed with a smile as I calmed down. "Thanks, North. It's good to talk to somebody who doesn't have much bias with this, you know?" I asked.

"Yeah, I get what you mean." We stopped. "Well, should we start heading back?" I nodded.

"Yeah, best to get back before we're missed." I agreed. As we walked back, I wanted to ask her about why she was up. "Hey, you never did tell me why you were up." 

"I wanted to get some time to breathe too. I know we have a sleep mode and everything, but...even if I love him, I do need some time away from Markus for myself." I chuckled.

"Speaking of which, how is it going with you two?" I asked.

"It's going good, actually. I never thought he'd be the guy to want a girlfriend, but once you get past how serious he needs to be al the time, he's actually really interesting and even fun at times."

"Markus? Having fun? That is hard to picture!" We both laughed.

"Well, he likes to paint. He's very good at it. I know we're androids, but still. I met his father, Carl. Well, adoptive father, anyway."

"Sounds like Connor and Hank." I chuckled.

"Carl isn't like Hank. He's very wise. Markus goes to him for advice a lot. He's actually gotten a lot better since when he was bedridden during the revolution."

"It got that bad?" I asked.

"Yes, unfortunately. But he's been getting better thanks to medical android movements. They've been coming up with ways to help people like him. It's really fascinating, actually." I smiled.

"That's great!"

"Yeah, Markus is happy about it. He wants Carl to live forever like us." I nodded.

"I can understand that," I admitted. "It's never easy to let go of people you love."

"I guess you and you're family understand that more than most." I nodded.

"Yeah, but I'm not saying people who've gone through it don't understand. It can be hard for anyone and everyone."

"I know what you mean." We kept walking and we soon arrived back at New Jericho. "Well, it was nice walking and talking with you, Cassandra." I chuckled. 

"You too, but please, call me Cass. I've always felt like my full name is a bit too proper sounding. I don't mind it, but with my friends...it just feels kinda weird." She nodded.

"I get it. See you around." I nodded with a smile as she headed off.

"See you around."