When Stars Collide With Hate

Chapter 16

"No," mabilis kong sagot. "May sarili akong buhay, Raphael. Hindi lang sa'yo umiikot ang mundo—"

"Fine," he said, cutting me off. "I'll just find out myself."

Binaba niya ang tawag bago ko pa siya masagot.

Putangina. Ano na namang trip nito?! Lalo niya lang ginugulo akong feelings ko sa ginagawa niya. Pakshet ka Raphael! Pakshet!

Mateo chuckled beside me. "Wow. Someone sounds possessive. Siya ba 'yung kasama mo sa coffee shop before? Boyfriend mo na ba 'yun?" sunod sunod niyang tanong.

Wait. Napakinggan nya ba 'yung usapan namin ni Raphael? May pagkachismoso talaga 'tong jejemon na 'to.

I glared at him. "No."

"Right," he said, obviously not convinced. "Pero bakit parang may gusto siyang malaman kung nasaan ka? Parang concerned masyado."

"Gago ka ba? Kung guguluhin mo ako ay umalis ka na lang."

He grinned. "Okay, okay. I'll stop—for now."

I've tried to remain focused sa pagrereview, but my mind was a mess. Between Mateo's annoying presence and Raphael's unexpected call, I felt like I was being pulled in two directions. At the back of my mind, I had this sinking feeling na hindi matatapos ang araw na 'to nang walang gulo. Please lang 'wag naman sana...

And I was right.

Not even an hour later, may nagdoorbell.

Tumayo si Shaira at nagpunta sa pinto, pagbalik niya ay nakatingin siya sa akin na para bang naguguluhan. "Uh, Julian? Nasa labas si Professor Yapchengco."

Dahan-dahan akong tumayo at sumilip sa may pinto.

Nakatayo siya doon na parang inip na inip na. What the fuck is he doing here?!

Nagbulungan ang mga ka group namin at nagtatakang tumingin sa may pintuan kung saan nandun si Raphael. 'Yung iba ay biglang umayos ng upo at para bang nalilito sa biglang pagsulpot niya. Miski ako ay gulong gulo rin sa nangyayari.

"Uh, sir? Anong ginagawa niyo dito?" Shaira asked, her voice was filled with confusion.

Raphael simply smiled, as if he wasn't currently ruining my entire life. "Oh, I was just looking for Julian," he said smoothly. "Didn't expect to walk into a little study session, though. Interesting group."

He suddenly looked at Mateo, who's standing beside me. Please 'wag kang magsasalita nang bagay na parehas nating pagsisisihan.

"Small world, huh?" Mateo said, crossing his arms.

Napkurap-kurap si Shaira. Nakatingin siya sa akin, kay Raphael, at kay Mateo. "Wait—so magkakilala rin kayo?"

"Yeah," I almost whispered and gave her a small nod. "Something like that—"

"More than that, actually," Raphael quickly said, cutting me off. "Right, Julian?"

'Di ko mapigilan ang pagkunot ng noo ko. I can feel it, that any moment from now, everything will go spiral out of control. Gusto ko na lang magpanggap na mahimatay para matapos na ang lahat ng 'to. Paanong simpleng group study ay naging ganito? Sa susunod ay hindi na ako sasali sa group study, parang nagkaroon ako ng trauma sa nangyayari ngayon.

Mateo chuckled. "You know, sir," he said, emphasizing the word 'sir.' "I never figured you for the type to crash a study session. Must be really important if you went out of your way to find Ju here."

Raphael didn't even blink. "He's important," he said so quickly. "Wouldn't be here if he wasn't."

Putangina! Ganito ba ang confused?! Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba ako makaramdam ng kilig pero mas nangingibabaw 'yung kaba ko.

Pati si Shaira, narinig 'yung sinabi ni Raphael. Napatingin lang siya sa akin na para bang marami siyang gustong itanong.

"Ah, okay..." sabi ni Mateo pero ramdam mo 'yung pag ka sarcastic sa boses niya.

I needed to put a stop to this. Now. Anything else would be too much for us–for me to handle.

Hinila ko palabas si Raphael, hindi na ako nakapag paalam kay Shaira at sa mga kaklase namin. Ang gusto ko na lang ay makalayo dito. Halo-halo 'yung pakiramdam ko ngayon. Stress na kinikilig na kinakabahan.

"Raphael, bakit ka nandito?"

Raphael looked at me as if I was asking the most obvious thing in the world. "I told you, hinanap kita."

I forced a smile on my face. "And you just magically knew I was here?"

For the first time since he arrived, a small smirk appeared on his face—one that sent a sudden realization on me.

Oh, fuck.

Nanlaki ang mata ko.

I forgot to turn off my IG location again, didn't I?

"Raphael, nakita mo na ako, okay? So you can go," sabi ko pag-iiba na lang ng usapan.

"Actually—"

"Saka mo na lang sabihin sa akin pagkatapos ng midterms."

He looked like he wanted to say something but chose not to–he just walked away. Just like that I found myself catching my breath. Parang nalimutan kong huminga dahil sa nangyari kanina. Pagkatapos ay bumalik na ako sa bahay nila Shaira. Kahit gusto kong 'wag ng bumalik ay pinilit ko dahil nandun 'yung mga gamit ko, lalo na 'yung laptop ko.

Pagpasok ko ng bahay ay lahat sila nakatingin sa akin at hinanap ng mata ko si Mateo pero hindi ko siya nakita. Nagpanggap akong parang walang nangyari at umupo sa may side table saka kinuha ang notes ko.

I was busy reading my notes when I heard Shaira.

"Julian," she began. "What the actual fuck was that?"