The Regular Show X Reader

The Unicorns Have Got to Go

The 1st unicorn said. "Here, use this!" The 5th unicorn, Jimmy, hands Mordecai a bottle full of a sparkling turquoise liquid. "Huh, fine." Mordecai pours it onto his hand and slicks his hair back with it. He looks at it in the reflection on the glass window. "Are you sure she'll be into this?" He asked. "Totally, bro, she'll be all about it. All you gotta do is lay it down." The 1st unicorn said. "Lay it... down." Mordecai said. "Yeah, bro, you know: lay it down!" The unicorns all chant 'lay it down' as one of them pushes Mordecai into the coffee shop. Mordecai sighs nervously and suddenly (Y/n) walks in. She turns to him. "Oh hey, Mordecai, turns out I forgot something. Rigby isn't still mad at us, is he?" She asked. "What? Oh... no, he's not, he's not." He said. The unicorns are seen through the window, laughing and high-fiving.

"So what did you come back for?" (Y/n) asked him. "I'm uh, I'm here to... lay it down." He said. "What?" (Y/n) asked, looking at him with confusion. "Lay it... down?" He said. "Um. Sure. Are you feeling OK?" (Y/n) asked. The unicorns and Rigby laugh from the window. "Yeah, I'm great, uh, I'll be right back." He replied. Mordecai runs outside. "What the H, guys? Not cool!" He said. "Chill out, bro! We were watching you in there and little dude had a really good point." The 1st unicorn said.

"What point?" Mordecai asked. "That we're totally not hanging out enough." The unicorn replied. "Aw, jeez." Mordecai said. "Don't worry. We're still gonna help you get your lady." The unicorn said. "How?" Mordecai asked. "By partying at your place!" The unicorn replied. "Wait what?!" Later at the park house that night, the lights are on and rock music is playing as a TV smashes through an upper window. Inside, the unicorns are chugging soda and fighting in the kitchen. Rigby and Mordecai are inside the back door, watching the carnage. "Ha ha! Ha ha ha!" Rigby laughed.

"Dude, these guys aren't trying to help me. They're just messing with me." Mordecai said. "Dude, they're just partying." Rigby said. "How is this supposed to help me get (Y- the ladies?" Mordecai asked. Rigby scoffs with his arms crossed, before pointing to someone sitting in a chair. "They got you a lady!" They see a long-haired man with an open green shirt on a chair in the corner. He has stubble on his chin, a necklace, wristbands, blue jeans, and cowboy boots. "That's not a lady." Mordecai said. Mordecai approaches the 1st unicorn, who's drinking soda with the 2nd unicorn. He puts his hand on the 1st unicorn's shoulder.

"Hey, I thought you were gonna help me with (Y/n)." He said. Rigby turns and points at him. "AHA! See? You were trying to use that on (Y/n)! I knew it!" Rigby shouts angrily. Before Mordecai can reply, the unicorn speaks up. "Something's touching me!" He shouted. The 1st unicorn elbows Mordecai, who flies onto the floor. The unicorns laugh. "Hey, bros, check this out." Rigby approaches Mordecai.

"Here, let me help you up." He pulls his hand away at the last second. "Psych! Why don't you ask (Y/n) to help you up? Ohhhhh!" Rigby said, saying her name bitterly again. The unicorns all laugh. "You know what, Rigby? Have fun with your new friends, you jerk. Oh, and just so you know, when Benson finds out about your friends and their little hangout time, he's probably gonna fire ya. Later, bro." Rigby suddenly panics. "Mordecai, wait!" But he slams the door on the way out. "Bros! I found a trampoline!" The 5th unicorn said.

"No!" Rigby runs up to his room. "What are you doing to my bed?" He asked. "You sleep on this, bro?!" The unicorn asked. "Get off it!" Rigby snapped. "Right after this somersault." The unicorn flips in mid air and his horn rips the trampoline, falling to the floor. "Bros, this trampoline's all over me. Help me get it off!" The unicorns run in, chanting 'bros', and in a matter of seconds reduce the trampoline to torn fabric and twisted metal. "My bed!" Rigby shouted. The 1st unicorn and 3rd unicorn are by the closet door. "Hey, bro. You know this nerd?" They open the closet door to show Benson, bound, gagged, and suspended from a coat hook. Benson rages from behind his gag, but his words are unintelligible.