The Heartbreak Factor - Part Four

Chapter Sixty-Eight.

Reluctantly, I wiggled out from beneath Katy’s arm that were wrapped tightly around me, making sure she was still asleep. Creeping over to the bathroom, I knocked gently on the door. 

“It’s not locked,” George’s voice groaned from the other side of the door. 

Opening up the door, I sighed the moment that I saw George slumped on the floor - his back against the side panel of the bath. 

“I take it as it didn’t go well?” I asked, closing the door behind me and sitting on the floor beside him. 

“You could say that,” George replied. 

“What happened?” 

“He happened.”

“Well, that narrows it down,” I sighed sarcastically. 

“Why him, Sammy? You could have got with any other guy in the whole wide world. Why did you have to get with him?” George asked. 

“I didn’t ‘get with’ him,” I paused. “I didn’t ‘get with’ anyone but you.”

George looked at me. “What?”

“I know you slept with Emma. It’s okay. I’ve forgiven you. But I didn’t sleep with him. God knows I had the chance to - many chances, but I just couldn’t. I couldn’t do that to you. I couldn’t do that to us.” 

George’s mouth dropped. “That makes this even worse.”

“Why does it?” I asked. “It’s in the past now.”

“Because it wasn’t about sex with you two. It was more than that, wasn’t it?” 

I looked at George in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

George turned to face me and looked me straight in the eyes. “Sammy, I need you to look me right in the eyes and say you didn’t love him. I know that night we got back together when all that drama with Rio and Katy going missing and everything happened. I know that night you said you didn’t love him but something tells me you did love him, even if it was just a tiny bit. He loved you. He told me tonight he loved you.”

I paused. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to do. George’s eyes were staring right at me. I couldn’t stay silent because then he’d take it as I did love him. I couldn’t say no because then George would have accused me of lying. But I couldn’t say yes because I couldn’t bare to look at George’s face as he heard me say it.

“Well?” George asked. 

“Okay. I did love him. He was there for me when you weren’t, but I wasn’t in love with him.” 

There it was. The look I was dreading the most. George’s eyes fell straight to the floor as he listened to the truth. Something I was hiding from him since the night we got back together sixteen months ago. 

I took hold of George’s hand but he pulled away from my touch immediately. “George, you have to understand that I wasn’t in love with him. I was in love with you. I always have been in love with you.”

“Like there’s a difference?” he scoffed. 

“There is a difference. You say you love your friends and family, but you’re not in love with them. You don’t love them in the same way you love the love of your life. That’s you, George. I’m in love with you. I’m not in love with my mum.”

George looked at me through the hurt in his eyes. “But that doesn’t ignore the fact that you lied to me. You said to me that you didn’t love him and now you’re telling me you did.”

“Why does this matter?” I asked. “This was last year. Everything has changed since then. We’re married now. We’ve got twins on the way. Doesn’t that change things?” 

George shook his head. “It doesn’t change the fact that you lied to me.” 

“I didn’t lie to you though. I said I thought I loved him that night we had the heart-to-heart, the night we got back together. So don’t you dare make out like this is my fault. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s your fault. You were the one who brought that girl back to our apartment when I still lived there and made out with her on our sofa. The sofa we bought together in the apartment we lived together.” 

George rolled his eyes. “Are we really going to do this all over again?”

“Well, you were the one who brought up this whole Justin and love thing so why not bring her into it?” I asked. 

“It’s in the past.”

“Exactly,” I replied. “If it’s in the past, why are you bringing it up now?” 

“I..”

I interrupted George before he had chance to finish what he was going to say. “No, George. You can’t do this. It was your idea to go for a drink with Justin, not mine. I didn’t think it was a good idea in the first place but you insisted you needed to do it. How do you expect me to feel when you say you need to do it? It’s like you needed to prove something, like you had won or something. But the truth is, if you’re just going to be like this every time he’s mentioned or whenever you see him, why the fuck do you think it’s a good idea to move to Los Angeles where he lives and hangs out? Chances are, we will see him a hell of a lot more if we move to Los Angeles so why do you want to move here if its in the past? He’s the past, George. You’re my future. You, Katy and the twins. I don’t get why you think moving to Los Angeles is a good idea when we’re happy enough back at home, in London.”

George let out a deep and irritated sigh before getting up on his feet and walking to the bathroom door. 

“George, if you walk out of this bathroom without sorting this out, Katy and I will get the first plane back to London in the morning,” I threatened.  

Looking back at me, George paused before opening up the bathroom door and walking into the pitch black bedroom.