in an open relationship 2

It's the day of the launch ceremony, I have to start at Andrew's and then head back to the house to get dressed,Ethan said he'll have the designer deliver my dress and I'll probably find the makeup artist waiting for me back at the house ,he made sure to hire the same one that did my makeup for our wedding because " she knows what she's doing" ,I wonder what that means to the ones who have been hired to do my face in the past .

I arrive at Andrew's just in the neck of time if I had my breakfast I would've been late .

I haven't seen this stern face in weeks it feels like I'm seeing it for the first time , she's wearing a loose silky dress in the black colour as always with crossed legs she greets me calmly.

" Mrs Price, how have you been?" She asks .

" Good , pretty good" the nerves are detectable in my voice .

" On a scale of one to ten , how good?" .

" 8 ".

She notes it down in her book ," what about the two ?".

" In terms of transparency I don't think we are there yet , it still bothers me ".

" What bothers you exactly?".

" Like I mentioned, not knowing how he felt all those years , I'm grateful that his hatred turned into love but I still want to know why he did all the things he did , what kind of thoughts were raging through his head " .

She leans back on her chair," are you sure you want to know?" Her eyes pierce at me .

" Of course " I say doubtfully, at this point I'm expecting her to know the answers to my questions with the one on ones she's been having with Ethan she must know the answer and I'm hoping that she'll give them to me .

" Tell me about the wedding?" ,She changes the subject.

" It was amazing ".

" I saw that it was amazing, my question is how was it for you , how did you feel ".

" Oh ... Great . It wasn't fake , for the first time I was happy for me the way other people were , I did feel like the queen of Ethan's heart like the hashtags say , I used to get chocked  when I read tweets about us , people saying all sorts of sweet things about us , exalting us in everything we do but ever since the wedding I've been reading them with uncontainable peace , it still feels surreal but I feel like the world's only princess, I also didn't know but we needed the wedding " I respond blushing.

" And between you two ?, You haven't consummated have you ?" She asks such a personal question without flinching.

" No " I hesitate anxious that she might ask me why .

She replies with a subtle nod ," from your standpoint of things there is a slight improvement?".

" Yes ".

" How is he towards you ?".

" Sweet , the old Ethan I used to know is slowly coming back, he gives into my many requests " .

" Like ?".

" A house , we bought a new home ,I just thought it'd be better for us to move to a new place where we can start over on a clean slate,that house is associated with so many bad memories that I want to forget ".

" Congratulations " she says dryly.

" Thanks ".

" About the wedding, you've expressed how skeptical you get when it comes to the things he says , what were your exact words again?,' acting face or real face ' , did you believe what he said to you at the altar?".

" Uh " my mind wanders.

She pulls out a piece of paper and recites Ethan's vows to me again.

I clear my throat," I believed him ".

" Past tense?".

" No I still do , I believe him, I'm confident he has fallen in love with me ".

" So why can't you run with that ?, Why do you want to dig up a painful wound ?".

" Like I said I feel like that will bring us closer, closure always helps one find peace ".

She sighs deeply," what if that closure you are desperate for puts an end to this butterfly filled garden that you are currently in ?, What if it undoes every effort you two have made to come together?".

The look in her eyes is telling me that I don't want to know the truth no matter how convinced I am that I do .

" Can you handle it ?".

I know that women in my state are not supposed to be under any pressure, her questions are dismantling me from that mindset , now I feel like I don't want to know the truth, why does it need handling?.

" I think so ".

" That's not a definite answer, Lauren my question is, would you still want to know how he felt if the real truth as to why he treated you the way he did  puts what you have now at a very volatile state ".

" Honestly.... No " , I have a secret that will destroy what we are building that I wish I could hide forever but unfortunately that's impossible, if he's secret is bigger than mine than I'm certain I don't want to hear it but this conversation is making me all the more curious.

She diverts the conversation and starts teaching me all about forgiveness again and how I should start with myself.

Her secretary disrupts her lecture,she pokes her head in" the DC is here " .

" I'll be right out " ,she excuses the secretary.

" Mrs Price just five minutes " she leaves .

I scan around the office and my eyes keep coming back to the device in front of me , she must've recorded all her conversations with Ethan on it as well .

I bite my lip fighting the temptation to listen to it , I arrest my arms behind my back remaining completely still.

10 minutes later the secretary comes back delivering  Andrew's message that we'll resume our session next week .

I see the perfect opportunity to take the recording with me , I doubt there's any camera in this room I've scanned it all too well , my phone is next to the device which makes it easier for me to snatch both of these items without being caught, the secretary is searching through some of Andrew's files , whoever or whatever the DC must be one important person to make this young lady nervous.

" Okay , goodbye then, please bid her goodbye for me ".

" Sure mam " .

I swiftly exit the room feeling extremely guilty for what I just did , I run to my car ,taking in huge breathes that was unlike me , a loud voice in my spirit is telling me to return it but I'm afraid I'll get caught by doing that so I decide to not listen to it , I'll just have to deal with Andrew when the time comes but for now the ceremony is my priority.