Next Big Recognition Contest

Round 21

Genre: Action

Rating: PG13 for violence, it is an action genre book folks. 

Winning Comment: Perspective: This chapter seems to have a third person multiple perspective, meaning that we are jumping from one person's thoughts to another.

The first part seemed like it was third person limited perspective but that may be because the man was the only character introduced. Once we get to the second half of the chapter and the Turner siblings are introduced, then it becomes multiple perspectives, including a disembodied narrator. That's not official terminology lol but for me, a disembodied narrator is narration does not belong to any of the characters in the scene. For example:

- Joe and Daisy Turner stood in front of the man as he turned...meant that the two belonged to the most famous Monster Hunting family in the world. But the man didn't know that.

The multiple perspectives we are shown are the man's and the siblings. See below:

- Man's thought process: His mind questioned his body of why it was shaking, maybe it had something to do with him sensing a dark aura around the two kids.

- Siblings thought processes: "Don't you think that's unnecessary if we're going to kill him anyway?" Daisy asked, seeing that Joe was already prepared to kill the man as his hands played with his weapon.

What you should be aiming for is third person omniscient perspective, meaning that the narration includes all the thoughts and feelings of all characters present but more organized than third person multiple. Third person omniscient perspective can be very difficult to write. Oftentimes, it adds a sense of imbalance for the reader and a lack of connection to characters. We never find equilibrium within a story because we jump from perspective to perspective. However, there have been authors that have achieved this.

Here is a FANTASTIC article differentiating multiple and omniscient POV with examples also ☺ It lists out the pros and cons of omniscient. Take a read when you have time: http://www.scribophile.com/academy/using-third-person-omniscient-pov 

Network with this Winner: PipSqueeks88

1st Runner Up: jjyves14

2nd Runner Up: ariel_paiement1

Final Author's Note: I'd like to say thank you to every member of the NBR family for reading and leaving wonderful comments on my story. They were all wonderful and very encouraging, pointing out the silly mistakes I wasn't able to spot. I had asked for high level feedback and I got it. Thanks. Peace Out.

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Author #3:  Sidney-C-Grey  

Book Title: Beyond the Stars

Specified Chapter: Not a Con (Chapter 3)

Summary Thus Far in Book: After Gaige's prized possession was taken away by his foster guardian because she thought it was too dangerous, Gaige meets Captain Syka Tearce who has offered him a job on his spaceship even though its illegal.

Author's Note: Wow. I still can't believe I'm being spotlighted! :O