I'll get through it, or die trying.
Don't think there is a better way to explain suicide, in my opinion. I'll either recover or one of my suicide attempts will be successful. It's bad that suicide is my back up plan, I know it's bad but I can't help thinking it. Whenever anything might go wrong my first thought is that I can kill myself if it does go wrong. Death shouldn't be my answer to everything, but it seems so easy. At the moment I'm not sure I'll have enough money for my rent this November and I'm getting a new job with less hours because I can't handle the stress of a full time job. Then again, I'm not even sure I'll be alive by the end of November. That's exactly the type of thinking that is slowing my recovery down and yet I don't know how to stop it and no one seems to want to help me.